♪ Waiting in the waiting room ♪

Yesterday we waited 3 hours before asking the receptionist how much longer. We were coughed on, sneezed on and educated quite thoroughly on Rheumatoid Arthritis and Irritable Bowel Syndrome before leaving. “I can’t tell you exactly m’am” droned the receptionist, in time with her rolling eyes, “But it will be at least 2 hours still.”…

Consequence…as surreal as the outside world to a goldfish…

One of my daughters, who shall remain nameless, in the interest of protecting the “innocent” …and what have you, has been known to have the odd problem at school, here and there, because who hasn’t really, and also, she’s a teenager. I am used to getting calls from principals and teachers, counselors and most recently…

Who is WE exactly???

Her face so sweet and innocent. Her eyes so curious and hungry for knowledge… “We’re not allowed to cremate Jews right?” The room spun upside-down and it was all I could do to keep the nausea from getting the best of me. Should I put her in private school? Lock her in the basement? Call…

Give it to me baby

So… I went to a dinner party not that long ago and I have to say, it was one of many that found it’s way to the conversation of sex and how women felt they just weren’t getting enough of it. Some who hadn’t had any in months, others who hadn’t had any in YEARS, all…

It’s Business Time

So tomorrow is Valentine’s day and it brings to mind visions of adoring glances, juicy kisses, cinnamon hearts, chocolate boxes and the Flight of the Conchords song Business Time. I know, I know, there is a mountain of you grinchy people who think it’s stupid and where the hell does Wallgreens/Pharmasave get off telling you what…

That NO-Feeling

  A friend of mine was seeing a therapist years ago who counseled on the theory that you (we, as humans) would be more balanced and grounded if we listened to our bodies when they had NO-feelings. Not no feelings, but NO-feelings. What I mean is, that feeling of dread or I-don’t-want-to-do-this. That..Oh boy..this is…

And the cervix of a 19 year old…

I’ve always looked young for my age. I’d be the only one left out of the bar, as my friends filed in giggling and giddy on rum and coke Slurpees, with their fake ID and shoveled on make-up. The bouncers would laugh at me and tell me to go home to my mommy. I was…

Dear Boyfriend, I think you might be Polish

My boyfriend, is convinced that he is Spanish. His father’s family is Acadian from New Brunswick and his mother was born in Montreal but adopted as an infant and apparently has no information about her cultural background. François has taken it upon himself to choose an ancestral background and has acquired the hellbent insistence that…

Are you on fire? No. Are you Bleeding? No. Then it can wait.

I know it will be a long recovery process physically, eating breakfast exhausts me. I suspect there will be some emotional recovery also. It’s inexplicably surreal to wonder one minute if you will survive the night and then only days later be staring at a dog that is begging you to take her out to…