Where dreams go to die

My good friend Nanci and I have known each other since we were about 14 years old. She’s one of the smartest, funniest and most talented people I know and I love her to pieces. I’m not sure exactly how the seed was planted. I think my girlfriend suggested we do it so I brought…

Is there such thing as too much Self Care?

It wasn’t even 7:00pm and I literally couldn’t keep my eyes open. I had chills even though the thermometer read 16 degrees Celsius in the house. What? Oh, yes I know, the BBC weather guide says that the “recommended temperature is 21 degrees Celsius (69.8 degrees Farenheit), but you may be more comfortable at a higher temperature. If…

Sleepless In Montreal

As the upstairs neighbours drift into a euphoric slow-wave dreamless delta state, their  brain waves slowing and enlarging blissfully like the heart of an angel (with dilated cardiomyopathy), a sudden and almost paralyzing shriek fills the air. “FLO GET THE F*@&! AWAY FROM THE DOOR! I swear to god I’ll spray you!” The screen door we installed…

Sophistication, Success and Serial Killers

My idol, Julia Cameron, includes this exercise in a few of her brilliant books, The Artist’s Way, the Sound of Paper and perhaps some others, where she encourages her reader to visit their own perceptions of what items for them could serve as a token of success. I have taken it a step further and…

Women are ‘horrible horrible liars’

      Warning: Exceptionally, the following content was not written in a humorous tone and and may be disturbing or triggering to some readers. Reader discretion is advised.   Women are ‘horrible horrible liars’. According to Donald Trump in 2016, while referring to some of the women who have… accused him of sexual assault…

Yaaas Queen ! And other reasons for you to hate me

I’m having a very hard time distinguishing where that very fine line between being sensitive to and perpetuating racism is. Where do you draw that line? I’m not being flippant, I’m asking real questions and I need real answers. I’ve always loved the name Diego. The name Diego is a Spanish baby name and I,…

Upright Citizen’s Brigade New York

Since I was a little teeny tiny person, I’ve had a dream. A dream that so many others have had and still have today. A dream so unattainable and cliche yet real. I dreamed of fame and fortune and funny. But I’m not famous, I have no fortune and, as it turns out, I’m not nearly…

Because I’m funnier than you (a public apology of sorts)

In 2003 I was co-producing a regular Burlesque show in Montreal called Diary Of A Lost Circus, with my very dear and long lost friend Domenic Castelli. Which isn’t to say that he is literally lost. At least I hope that he isn’t, because it would be incredibly insensitive of me to mention it on…