JUNE 30, 2015
POSTED BY JENNIFER JUNE (ADMIN)
I’m going through a reflective and introspective time I guess.
I’m not feeling very social but the few encounters I do have these days, I appreciate very much.
I found this little guy on my deck a couple of days ago,
and I made him my mentor. I’m not sure
that he/she has any interest in the job mind you, but the task at hand is relatively simple.
I can take it from there. I’ll project whatever meaning I need.
Oh look, a snail. That means I should stay in my shell and slowly, yet mindfully, keep moving forward.
My brain turns like a hamster wheel, thinking and over-thinking, and analyzing, and what-if-ing, until my head hurts lately so, to try and create some sort of balance,
I try to keep my body moving almost as much as my mind.
It seems to be the only time I’m not thinking.
Or at least when I’m thinking, the thoughts are less demanding.
How much farther? How much longer? Hey, that’s not a muscle… what is that? Oh my God I’m going to die, why did I think this was a good idea? Oh cute, look at the boats…
In all of my thought lately, I’ve spent a considerable amount of time feeling quite sorry for myself.
But I also have had these moments of clarity. Some painful and some refreshing. Or both.
Yesterday I went for a 20 minute run with my neighbour, then did an hour of boxing. Then I rode 20 kilometres on my bike… all before I even started my day.
It wasn’t planned, it just all kind of happened and I was really glad that it did.
I imagine for a lot of people that’s not much of a feat, but there was a time, not that long ago, that I wouldn’t have believed that I was capable of doing that, let alone enjoying it.
I felt proud and I felt strong, but more than anything, I just felt really really really grateful.
To my neighbour who runs with me at 6 o’clock almost every morning, even though she starts each run by telling me how much she hates me for making her do it.
– Who, by the way, I’m am really proud of because she has broken her own record every single run we’ve done. And as much as she “hates” me for it, she keeps showing up, with a smile on her face.
To my trainer who is so inspiring, encouraging and kind in all the most perfect ways.
To the friend who gifted me the bike and believed in me when I didn’t feel like I deserved it and was scared to ride it.
And to my body for fighting odds and becoming strong enough to do all these things that make me
Oh, and also to the little snail who crawled across my deck the other day – for reminding me to
stay centred, and to slowly and mindfully keep moving forward.
Places I’ve been, while I wasn’t here:
Pimm’s Cup – The Wimbledon Cocktail
Veggie Dogs – 3 Ways