Pre-Mature Mid Life Crisis

Pre-Mature Mid Life Crisis


15 days until I turn forty

(I told you I couldn’t make any promises) and I’m thinking I should make a top-ten-list of things I can finally do now that I am going to be having a pre-mature mid-life crisis.

1 ) Start listening to Kenny G.

2 ) Host a weekly bridge night.

3 ) Buy Crocks and pretend they’re for gardening only but then wear them out for espresso martinis with Nanci

4 ) Become a Start wearing my Cougar T-Shirt.

5 ) Buy a harp.

6 ) Hire a life coach who will support my dream to start my own underwater basket weaving school.

7 ) Experiment with past life regression therapy and try to convince all of my friends that I used to be Cleopatra.

8 ) Fire all the friends who refuse to believe me and find brand new ones at a  The Secret meetup group.

9 ) Steal/Rescue a pet emu from an emu farm, keep it in the backyard and fight all my neighbours in court when they complain.

10 ) Start urban emu owners meetup group.

This is just a start, I’m open to suggestions. Any thoughts?

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