Recovering a Sense of Abundance

I’m recovering a sense of abundance this week, did I mention that?

One of the exercises is to find 5 beautiful flowers to press in a book.

In need of some well deserved time out from the crazies – And also to find my flowers of course – I went out in search of nature yesterday.

I wasn’t sure exactly where to go but I got on a bus and asked the driver,

“Do you drive near any water…ever?”

He nodded and off we went.

It wasn’t exactly what I had in mind, and there were no flowers. There were barely any leaves even. The trees looked barren.

I did see a fat brown animal that was the size of a raccoon but not a raccoon but he ran away before I could identify him.

And I did find these:

So, I now have an abundance of sticks. Will it pay the bills? No. Although I did, for a moment (or 12), imagine myself walking into Hydro Quebec with them and asking how many it would take to keep them from disconnecting us.

I get the exercise though. I felt happy with my little bundle, not without feeling slightly guilty for removing them from their rightful homes – because I’m weird that way.

I felt torn. I was righteousness and environmentally zen for recognizing that I don’t own these sticks. They own themselves. They are part of the earth and not mine to take.

BUt then I also thought. Seriously Jen? You feel so unworthy that you don’t even deserve the dead twigs laying in the dirt? Honestly? How are you going to recover a sense of abundance? How are you going to become wealthy and self sufficient if you don’t even think you are worth 5 sticks? If when all you want is a few discarded branches off a tree and you can’t muster up enough self entitlement to pick them guiltless from the ground….

And then I saw something shiny and lost my train of thought which was probably all for the best.

I also found these things but left them where they were because they were too heavy and awkward to carry.

Jennifer June